The Amaranthine Poet

Falling Under

Last night was a very crazy night. I had an unusual nightmare that began before I even went to sleep: It was about 1:00 a.m. and I was getting ready to go to bed. I went to the the laundry room to get my clothes out from the dryer when all of a sudden this terrible feeling washed over me. For some reason I got this feeling that I was going to die that night, I was completely convinced. I don’t know, it was just this weird feeling, but I just brushed it off and went to bed. It was very difficult to fall asleep because I kept thinking I was going to die, and when I finally did fall asleep, I woke up suddenly and this prayer came to my mind that I used to pray when I was little: “Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord, my soul to keep, if I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take,” (I’m sure everyone knows this prayer). It kinda freaked me out because that prayer just suddenly came to my mind and it scared me even more because of the part that goes, “If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.” So, it just came on my heart to pray that prayer and to repent of my sins, but I still blew it off, because I thought that there was no way I could die that night, it was just some random paranoia, and I was too tired to pray, so I went back to sleep. Besides, I figured, even if I did die, I would be with Jesus because I am saved. Anyway, so you know when you are dreaming and in your dream you trip or someone hits you or something, and your whole body twitches as if it actually happened? Well, thats kinda what happened to me. I was falling asleep when I felt this darkness kind of surround me, and then all of a sudden I felt like I was sinking through my bed and falling under. I got so scared because I thought I had died and was falling into hell. So, I tried to grab the sides of my bed to keep myself up, but I couldn’t, I felt completely helpless as I was falling into darkness. At this time, I didn’t even think to call to Jesus, I was just too afraid. Finally,the feeling went away and I opened my eyes and looked around only to find the stillness of my room and the hushing hum of my fan. This dream or feeling or experience, whatever it was, being so absolutely real and frightening, made me realize that I really should pray. So, I prayed to God for his peace and his protection and I repented of any and all sins that I had committed against him, and if I did die that I would be instantly brought in to his presence Then, as I finished my prayer, I hesitantly went to sleep, and that was when I had the dream part of my nightmare. I dreamt that I was in this type of classroom and there were hundreds of people around me. At the front of the room was a teacher. The teacher had many different faces, male and female, that just kept changing every second. I was watching the teacher when she/he stopped and turned towards me. Suddenly, her/his body went up in flames. I looked into her/his face and saw it turning black and melting off, incinerating. I saw excruciating pain reflected in her/his eyes. The flames continued to blacken and distort the face…I was so close, I felt the heat of the fire licking at my face. I looked around in shock…no one even noticed, they were all going about their own business, they ignored it as if it hadn’t even happened. I reached out to the estranged teacher with a empathetic and rather disturbed voice, “Can’t you feel that, don’t you know you are burning alive!!??” The teacher looked at me as if s/he had no idea what I was talking about, but in her/his eyes, I saw pain and torment. I was shocked that no one was doing anything about this!
So, then I woke up the next morning, ecstatic to see the light of day! I prayed about everything I had experienced and realized the meaning of that dream which I immediately understood that the Lord had given to me. First of all, just experiencing the completely isolated and hopeless feeling of being pulled into hell and separated from God, was unexplainable. I felt that I had neglected all of God’s calls and warnings to me that night to pray and repent…and wondered about if I did die without being washed clean, and if I did go to hell…I knew that would be the most tormenting feeling to know that I had the chance to prevent it by just calling out to the Lord and repenting of my sin. Also, the dream with the teacher, I believe that all the people around me were the saved children of God, and the teacher represented all the unsaved people and the people who call themselves Christians, but are those of whom God calls “lukewarm” (“So, because you are lukewarm, neither hot nor cold, before long I will vomit you from my mouth.” Revelation 3:16.) Watching the teacher burn alive symbolized the terrible thing we do everyday. Everyday, Christians watch people walk by and associate with people who don’t know Jesus and yet do nothing. We know that if these people die, they will suffer in hell, in complete isolation from God, where, “their worm does not die, and the fire is not quenched, everyone will be salted with fire.” Mark 9:48-49. Sad thing is that many of these people have no idea. And unsaved friend told me the other day that he thought hell was just a really boring place. That is so sad that he doesn’t even know what Jesus says about hell. Its sad that most people don’t realize that hell wasn’t made for people, it was made for Satan and his demons, it was made for sin, but as soon as we brought sin into the human race, we became condemned. So many people have no idea that that is why Jesus came as a loving and pure sacrifice for anyone that wants him ( John 3:16.) What this dream also made me realize is that so many people think, and have convinced themselves that they are Christians, that they are saved, but they are not. If you call yourself a Christian, but are living in sin, than you do not know what it means to be a follower of Jesus, to be Christ-like. Jesus says that, “sexual immorality, impurity, debauchery, idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, envy, drunkenness, orgies and the like will not inherit the kingdom of God” (Galatians 6:19). If these things are a part of your life you are not saved. The bible says, “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord.’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day,’ Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?’ Then I will say to them plainly, ‘I never knew you, depart from me, you evildoers!” (Matthew 8:21-23) Here Jesus is talking about the false prophets and people who praise the name of the Lord on Sunday or in front of other Christians and then go off sinning and cursing willfully in their lives. Everyone struggles with individual sins daily and that is easy to repent of, but if you struggle with certain sins like homosexuality or drunkenness, the power of the holy spirit can and will release you from them. (Romans 8:1-17). The bible also says that all of us are unclean, anyone who claims to be perfect claims God to be a liar. Anyone can become saved, you just have to put your trust in the Lord and follow him and his will, depart from your sin and God will give you a new heart which does not hold the desire to live with a sinful nature. And if you are a Christian, be sure to always keep yourself in a relationship with God, because it is highly possible to become unsaved again (its happened to me). I believe that keeping Jesus to yourself is a sad thing, you are just watching people line up and walk into open flames (literally). Anyway, I am grateful that you took the time to read about my experience last night, I just felt I needed to share this, because last night was a slap in the face and it was very realistic and disturbing, and it drew me closer to the glory of God. I don’t want to have on my conscious the idea that I had the chance to share Jesus with some people,and I didn’t. I don’t want to just stand by and watch anymore people burn because I know how real Jesus is and I know he is calling for people to stand up for him and be a vessel for his words and his works. The bible says that “the harvest is plenty but the workers are few,” and I want to be a worker.
So I guess I will leave it at that! “Let the wicked forsake his way…Let him turn to the Lord, and he will…freely pardon.” (Isaiah 55:7).