The Amaranthine Poet

Its Green, like Grass

August 2, 2007 on 1:49 pm | In Everything | 5 Comments

Today, I had another one of those adventurous, dangerous, wondrous, ponderous, fun..derous photo shoots with Amy (my photographer, who is amazing ) Ok, so she decided she wanted me to wear this dress that I never thought I would ever wear again, my prom dress. However, I didn’t really mind, because the dress is green, like grass, and I like the combination of green and grass.

We went to the Botanical Gardens for the shoot, which is a breathtakingly beautiful, multifaceted, nature place. Unfortunately though, as soon as nature seems to be too good to be true, something has to interfere and destroy its perfection. What is that something? Bugs and lizards! Haha, ya, they were everywhere! We sacrificed a lot of great spots because I didn’t want to cross paths with anything alive and inhuman. I’m not a complete wuss though. I was barefoot, walking on a ground of wannabe grass which was actually 7 feet deep of leaves and mud and jumping spiders and who knows what else. No exaggeration….well. I did see some interesting things though: I saw the silhouette of a lizard humping a tree (no, you aren’t dyslexic, you read that correctly. The lizard was in fact humping the tree). Go ahead and take a few seconds to fully imagine that…1….2….3…

We also met an old man who doesn’t like raisins in his oatmeal cookies, so he uses chocolate chips instead. His name was Jack and he was 83 going on 29 (in his words). He was sooo funny. He is a marathon runner and he said that when he was younger he would use his stopwatch to time how fast he ran his miles, but now he uses his stopwatch to time how slow he runs his miles. Hahaha, I thought that was so funny. He also told me that I must have British blood because I am slow at getting jokes (I don’t know how that makes sense, but, it was pretty funny.) Then he used the phrase, “pain in the patoot,” instead of pain in the you know what! Hahaha, that is so cute, I am going to say that now. You are such a pain in the patoot. He told us he had learned a little Arabic from one of his Egyptian friends, so he spoke to me in Arabic and then turned to speak to Amy in an exaggerated English yokel tone. Haha, that was sooo funny. Old people are sooo cool, they make the earth vibrate.

You know, you never truly appreciate nice grass until you are forced to sit in patchy, ugly grass with bugs. It’s experiences like these that makes me so happy to live around beautiful greeeeeeen grass that I can lay down in and write a song, then stare at the sky and listen to The Cranberries. If you stare directly into the sky at twilight, you can tell how round the earth is!
So, the lesson learned today isssss-Some things are sooooo beautiful to look at, but as soon as you come in contact with it, it becomes a little ugly! Kind of like a venus fly trap or fire!! Also, if you fall down on your butt or someone scares the patooti (haha) out of you, don’t let the first words that come out of your mouth be, “Mommy!” or you will be eternally teased for it, lol. Right, Ms. Amy? Ok, well, I am going to end this book of a blog now. My thumb is having a migraine.
<3 Jenn <3

Oooooh, P.S. About that bum that was eating wood a few blogs down. Ya, I saw him the other day…he did turn into a tree, and he did reach the star. However, they are both having a difficult time turning back into humans!